Growing Up Black
Growing up black British and a girl has always been accepting the fact that I would never be beautiful because I did not meet the beauty standard which was being white and slim with straight hair.
Growing up black British and a girl was pretending to not like chicken or watermelon - pretending to not enjoy rap, wearing certain clothes or having certain hairstyles. I would make myself sound a certain way to ensure I was not deemed as ‘that black girl’.
Growing up black British and a girl meant that you had to take ‘you’re pretty for a black girl’ or ‘I don't usually date black girls’ from boys as a compliment.
Photo Credit: Jazmin Quaynor
I would always wonder, does he like black girls? - that thought was always running through my head when I was interested in someone. Growing up black British and a girl was not talking about an absent father because you didn’t want to be a walking stereotype.
Never receiving the right mental guidance because when black kids cause trouble it’s just seen as a behavioural issue and nothing more.
Growing up black British and a girl was always being jealous of my white friends because they wouldn't have to think about being treated differently when applying for a job or getting racially profiled by the police. They would never have to think about impressing new people in hopes of being accepted as a regular person.
Photo Credit: Suad Kamardeen
Growing up Black British and a girl was being told about the statistics in your low income, predominantly coloured area and losing all hope that you would ever be more than what you’re told to be.
Growing up Black British is a battle of self hatred - black kids are raised in a system in which they are not truly appreciated and end up blaming themselves for it.
I now see myself as a beautiful, empowered black British woman, who doesn’t care about being accepted by people who don't see me as equal, who doesn’t care about your beauty standards and see’s individual beauty and only cares for men who see this.
Most importantly I’m a woman achieving my goals and dominating in life while looking good - helping as many people in the community as I can.